THE HOSTESS BECAME A GUEST AT 33 YEARS SOBER

I hosted A Gathering of Girlfriends for a Special Celebration Dinner. That’s right: I threw myself a very nice, catered party with gorgeous flowers and great food and invited nine of my closest girlfriends to celebrate me – with me. Of course, my guest list included professional women in recovery!

Did I feel uncomfortable? Yes!

At least at first I did, even though I want to be recognized, acknowledged, honored, respected, loved, seen, heard, and valued. I mean, who deep down doesn’t want to feel loved, worthy, and like they belong?

The thing is that I feel self-conscious (shame, like who do I think I am) when I make things all about me, especially when that puts me in the center of attention. I prefer being the event planner who creates an amazing party with the perfect ambiance and makes sure others have fun and enjoy the party. Naturally, I want to be appreciated for my efforts.

For my celebration, I challenged myself to be the event planner AND ALSO a guest. I wanted to have fun, enjoy my friends, and withstand any discomfort of being at the center while being celebrated for my significant 2021 milestones:

• Retiring from my full-time nonprofit development career and committing to full-time life coaching and consulting.
• Investing in my new home, which also houses my Wise Wild Worthy studio and workspace.
• Turning 59 full of gratitude for my gifts, talents, courage, and resilience – and feeling free to live my just-right life.
• Celebrating XXXIII years in 12-step recovery.

 So, how’d I do with being the event planner? I was successful.

I went all out for my girlfriends and myself and met all my expectations.

• Hired a caterer; ordered a cake
• Selected flowers and décor
• Found the perfect dishes; polished the silver
• Put together gratitude gifts for each guest
• Prepared the house for a wonderful evening to come

How’d I do with being a guest? I made progress!

When the first guest rang the bell, I was caught up with being the event planner. Guests continued arriving. I had intended to greet each at the front door yet was playing event manager before I let myself fully dive into the magic of the night. (Lesson learned: Next time I will hire a mini-me!)

The evening was beautiful, warm, intimate, fun, funny, yummy, gorgeous, and full of the best love, honoring, and celebration possible with my girlfriends. The evening went way beyond my wildest imagination. While I honored my girlfriends, each of them then honored me in a way I cannot put words to. It was magical!

I highly recommend we – wise wild worthy women – do this for ourselves. I had put myself out there, asking for soul food, and was given abundant and overflowing love and support. These women know the real me, the authentic me – and they love me.

Taking the risk to host my own celebration broke through my “I better stay small around others” barrier.

Fear of having an awkward and imperfect party kept me from mixing my friends until now. The next day, an outpouring of appreciation came for introducing my friends to each other. I hadn’t foreseen this outcome and am still reveling in the connections made and the belonging I felt. We’re already talking about gathering throughout the year for no good reason!

If you are a professional, successful woman committed to 12-step recovery and want to take a risk to create this kind of energy and connection in your life, book a call and let’s talk.