SUPPORT SYSTEMS + SAFE PLACES

When your support system is intact and your safe place is accessible – you can better self-manage in the face of a triggering event. Here are some steps I take when I feel emotionally hijacked or realize I’m triggered:

Physically Assess:

• Turn down the volume and limit all stimuli.
• Breathe in and out.
• Feel my feet on the ground.
• In stillness and quiet, check in with my body.
• I am physically safe.

Mentally & Emotionally Assess:

• Notice what my thoughts are and check in with my feelings. (My thoughts drive my feelings.)
• What am I doing and how am I behaving?
• Are my thoughts true, or is fear, shame, grief or anger talking?
• Identify that I am safe – even if I feel like a crashing wave just toppled me over.
• I will not escalate into drama, although I am uncomfortable.

Connect with my support system:

• Tell someone (with my best interest who won’t inflame my trigger) what I’m experiencing.
• Reach out to safe people – not to awfulize the situation, but to help me ground myself.
• Gather together when possible to have personal connection and affection.
• Talk through the trigger with my trusted someone who’s not adding fuel to the fire.
• My goal here is to laugh out loud – even through my tears. A phenomenal release for me!

Nurture myself through all of my senses:

• See the beauty in the sun, moon, stars, ocean, roaring fire, majestic mountains or a flowing river. See a smile come across someone’s face. Look into the eyes of the dreamy leopard on my refrigerator.
• Feel the sun on my face, the touch of a friend, a soft blanket, a cool breeze, a bubble bath or my cats perched gently in my lap. (I also love for my hair to be played with.)
• Taste the salt in the air, morning coffee, some chocolate or grilled cheese, and tomato soup (like mama used to make).
• Smell fresh cut grass, coffee brewing, blooming flowers, the ocean air, or the familiar smell of my home sweet home.
• Hear neighborhood sounds – a lawnmower in the distance, birds singing, squirrels scampering, Sycamores rustling in the summer breeze or my purring cats.

Intuitive and introspective, I’ve been committed to my own personal and professional growth for more than half my life. Even as an angry and struggling teenager, I knew there was something special inside me that would fully develop over time and surface at some point. I can tell you this:

Having a support system in place is super helpful so you can leverage opportunities to grow, heal and change. Set yourself up for success by shoring up your support system before you get seriously triggered.

You will feel better, behave better and do better if you turn down the volume amidst the churning and chaos. Nurture yourself and be the calm in a storm.

Not sure how to truly get to this place? I invite you to book a planning session – please bring your hurts and heart, your fears and disappointments. This free one hour will be an extraordinary gift you’ll give yourself that will clear the path to you getting exactly what you want in your one life.