HOW YOU SPEAK TO YOURSELF AND TO OTHERS MATTERS
Do you operate from beliefs and old tapes you learned at an early and impressionable age? Does your self-talk reflect internalized negative, mean, or contradictory messages from your family of origin or a traumatic experience?
Your lingering tapes may be driving you. Not only do these repressed messages and emotions do a number on you, but you also hurl your learned negativity at others. There are ways (and I encourage everyone) to heal and stop taking things out on yourself and others…
HOW YOU SPEAK TO YOURSELF MATTERS.
In 8th grade, I absorbed and internalized appalling and abusive messages. These messages were spoken about me, to me, and around me; there were no rebuttals or other points of view offered – ever. These inappropriate messages became my beliefs, and, tragically, my manual for growing up.
I kept my true feelings buried deep inside. I numbed out in a variety of ways while the messages and thoughts began driving my behaviors which led to some painful situations. Just one problem: the words were those of others.
I share my partly tragic story to offer hope and to help others heal.
MY STORY IS ONE OF MIRACLES, GRIT, RESILIENCE, AND TRANSFORMATION.
The good, the bad, and the ugly propelled me into who I am today. With recovery, therapy, and coaching, I’ve healed family of origin issues, messages, and traumas. I’ll let you know when my book comes out!
HOW YOU SPEAK TO OTHERS MATTERS.
In a mindless moment, your words can cut like a knife. Alternatively, your words can lift someone up.
Last week, an old friend said something really mean to me. She knew it was mean. I don’t know why she said it, and I’m not sure she knows. Thanks to the growth work I’ve done to heal my thoughts, feelings, actions, and behaviors – I don’t let disrespectful comments penetrate my self-esteem.
If I say something hurtful, I check in with myself asking what’s going on with me that I said that? I deal with what’s inside me – resolve emotions and negative thinking, apologize (profusely), and then forgive myself and move on.
WORDS MATTER.
While I cannot control others, I can surround myself with kind and positive people. Case in point: this week, a friend said, “You are a beautiful butterfly.” I let that comment right in and smiled big. It warmed my heart.
Like a butterfly struggling to emerge from its chrysalis, breaking through my past strengthened my resolve and capacity to grow, forgive, and heal. Healing my heart made it possible for me to be a consistently kind and authentic person – a positive role model for others.
It takes courage to extricate yourself from a past that still emanates through your thoughts, feelings, and actions. BE BRAVE. This is how we find the path to our own North Star.
BECOMING YOUR AUTHENTIC SELF AND LIVING YOUR BEST LIFE ARE THE KINDEST THINGS YOU WILL DO FOR EVERYONE AROUND YOU.
I personally know the freedom and joy on the other side of this journey, which is why I’m so passionate and dedicated to helping those of you who want to find your path and live your best life.
I absolutely know that change is possible.
On the other side of healing – the grass really is greener, and the rewards are abundant.
If you want to talk about your old tapes or struggles, book a time with me. Let’s visit for 45 minutes about where you are and where you’d like to be.
Most of my clients have done some growth work, yet something is missing or has them stuck. I am a go-to coach for successful women who want to heal more.
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